Now a question for you folks. W has decided to host some of her family at our home on Christmas Eve; my family will be elsewhere. My gut is telling me that I do not attend the event at our home - after all, I am detaching. W has not come to the table about anything regarding the PA, continues to get drunk and be disrespectful, etc. How do I tell her that I am not attending Christmas Eve without sounding spiteful or vengeful? I know her reaction will be "You're just doing this to punish me" and/or "You're being a baby about this." I am of the mind to say "Hey, for Christmas Eve I'll take the kids to my parents for a while and then drop them here for dinner. I'll be home later in the evening." and leave it at that.
Always trust your gut.
"I have other plans" should be your guiding thought.
I like this: "Hey, for Christmas Eve I'll take the kids to my parents for a while and then drop them here for dinner. I'll be home later in the evening."
Concrete time exchanges should be stated. Then negotiated if needed.
Rev 2:
"W, I plan on taking the kids to my parents on Christmas Eve and will drop them off here at 4pm so they can spend time with your parents"
Be firm on the plan, but flexible on the exchange time.
"What is best for my kids is best for me" Amor Fati Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
