Forgive yourself. It's in the past, can't control it -- so you have to let it go.

Resolve now to choose differently for yourself in the future.

What other things will you do next time if you feel that 'irresistible' or suffocating need to reach out. Plan for your alternative actions NOW, while your mind is in a better space. And commit to do those things instead.

If you haven't yet responded to her, something like, 'Hey, thanks for reaching out. I'm doing good! About to go X, Y, Z (fun activity you used to always do and are getting back into or new thing you are trying -- because you are getting a life, right?). Sorry to hear you were having some rough days. I hope you have a better one today! '

Me-53
W-49
D22,D18,D15
T-Since-12/2001
Married-9/2004
She Moved Out-5/28/2010
Piecing start-04/2011
Now-together
Thread
http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2079304