Hey B89. I wanted to share a few thoughts on sleeping. I just got over a bad virus of some kind and the doctor I saw recommended using some melatonin to help me sleep. A few years back during my first go-round with DBing, my doc prescribed Trazodone which originally was an anti-depressive but they've more wildly been prescribing it as an effective sleep aid. I took it when I wasn't naturally falling asleep and then worked my way off of it. Even some of the OTC sleep aids can be fine if exercise, decreasing blue light devices before bed, and other methods don't work.
Letting go of the past, memories, and experiences is almost always tough. I wish you didn't have to endure it. You did great by not calling her, no good would've come from it. Just do what you need to do to get through the day, try some things that reliably lift your spirits, and practice whatever self-care you need so that your health doesn't start to steadily slip by you. We're here as needed too.
