Today W asked if I was going to participate in Christmas Eve at our house with her family which has been a tradition. I said I need more time to think about it. W seemed flustered and said her family would always be welcoming. She asked where else I would go. I said I could go to one of my parents and come back that evening or the next morning. W said that seems inconvenient to which I said, I'd not find it inconvenient. I noted that W didn't plan to come to Thanksgiving at my father's (also a very welcoming place) and, though she ended up sick, she'd told D13 she was not coming. Not that we're playing tit for tat but it seemed like it might make sense for me to similarly detach from these traditions. W also indicated she was sad because she didn't expect her life to be this way at this point. I acknowledged it was tough and, as her choice, within her control (to make life what she'd like it to be). Today is also our anniversary and I've just gone about my business as usual. I'm fired so there is nothing to celebrate, right? Thanks for reading. It is helpful to journal a bit.
