Be sure to enforce your boundaries with optimism and acceptance, and not out of anger or hopeless despondency. Keep in focus that you are not rejecting HER, but rather her actions and choices. There could be a place for her in your life and bed if she chose differently.
If she reacts angrily or sadly, be sure to validate her and REALLY hear her -- I hear you Wife that this is not easy. I'm sorry you feel that way. Acknowledge and accept criticisms, hear her POV, and implement your self-work, 180s and GAL accordingly.
But, ultimately, I won't abide THIS for me and the kids anymore. I deserve better, they deserve better, and you also deserve better. I hoped that we could get to a better place. But I see that you are still choosing not to act like my wife. It's more of the same. And with me getting out more, meeting people, and thinking about things, I see that things will be better for me than they are like this.
You are leading, opening a door to someplace new. She may follow or not.
You will be ok either way, because you will be living your life true to yourself and values.
"What is best for my kids is best for me" Amor Fati Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
