It is essential that you enforce your boundaries to respect and value yourself and for your emotional health. When you live an authentic live with intact boundaries, you and your loved ones WILL be ok. I promise you will prevail, no matter the marital outcome.
And if she chooses not to change, you will have led yourself out of a painful limbo of trampled fences. And modeled self-respect and resilience for those wonderful kids of yours.
I logged in just now because I'm having a rough day, and this was very helpful to read. Thank you bustorama.
You have hit the nail on the head with the phrase "painful limbo". It's been ten weeks since DDay and while I make best efforts to remain optimistic, there are days like today when I feel very despondent. I realize that hoping for her to "snap out of it" while I work on my 180s and GAL without boundary enforcement is not what DB is all about. It's my fault that I've spent 1-2 years years communicating boundaries only for her to walk all over them. At this point the path to my own sanity is to move to end the marriage, because the way things have worked for the last 3 years doesn't work for me.
