My wife left me. I need help!

[Card29]

If you're an introvert, then that's who you are. I'm somewhere in between, so I enjoyed meeting lots of new people and making new friends, but I still enjoy my alone time. Maybe for you the time with family and a new hobby or two will be the keys to pulling you through this. Maybe through some activity you make 1 or 2 new friends. Don't be afraid to try some different things and see what you like.

One other tip I got this time around is find a new scent. If you never wear cologne, maybe just try one. If you already use something, go buy something completely different. Smell is strongly tied to memory. If whatever products you use remind you of date nights etc with your W, shelve that stuff and go get something different. If you hate anything scented, then disregard this idea haha. For me, it's been the easiest but most effective tool I've used to pick myself up when I'm in a hole emotionally.

I've seen some financial planners giving advice to people who have fluctuating income to make their budgets based on the lowest rolling 12 month income totals that you've had in the last 5 years, but it might be good to do some research on that. YouTube is obviously a great resource. Financial stress is a super common component in divorce, so if you can gain some confidence there with a solid plan, it's one less thing you have on your plate.

And yes, 2 weeks is a blink in this process. It's hard to hear, but this is just the beginning. The good news is the beginning is usually the hardest part emotionally. You're in fight or flight. Sleep can be impossible, appetite is minimal, nausea loves to rear its ugly head, the future seems impossible to face. Your journey, and your W's journey, through this is going to take minimum 2 years, but I promise it won't be this traumatic that whole time. People use the roller coaster analogy a lot on here. Like real roller coasters, the biggest ups and downs are usually at the beginning of the ride. They will turn more into smaller, rolling hills as time goes on. The good days will start outnumbering the bad. It will get easier. You're in survival mode for now, and that's normal. Post here frequently if you need (I know I have over the years, just look at my # of posts - lots of dark days!) and take it one day at a time.