As much as I wish 1) I was a DB coach and 2) a veteran - regretably I am not. I believe I quoted another member of the forum whose user name is/was Coach at one point and/or referenced that I worked with one of MWD's DB "official" coaches the first time D came up. I may also have mentioned my W has some unresolved trauma from a past relationship that seems similar to PTSD. Job has the best recommendation to reach out to the VA to see what resources they provide. I've got family who were in the military as well as close friends. Though it can be a pain, the VA actually seems to provide incredible benefits that our vets 100% deserve. Until that trauma/PTSD is addressed, my understanding from a prior marital counselor is that it will be difficult to impossible for the relationship to make positive progress. I wish I could help more. As others have said, please make sure you're doing things for your OWN well-being.
