I’m glad you posted. Get those thoughts and feelings out, let them go. The situation, W’s behaviour, is crazy making. You’ll go bonkers keeping all that bottled up.
Originally Posted by buck1
Since my last post, we decided to continue on our plan to file for legal separation. The plan was to continue to live and sleep together, to formalize our intent to "take a break" from our normal marriage relationship, and give ourselves the freedom to date other people if we want.
Is this something you actually are in agreement with? Or did you get talked into it? Or are you just being nice? You cannot nice her back. Although, that has been the norm over the years, which has reinforced and furthered the dysfunction of your relationship.
Thank you DnJ for taking the time to read my huge post and taking the time to respond to all those points. I read your every word carefully and it's already helping me immensely.
Actually I was in agreement with this plan to separate while living together on friendly terms. At the time I was slowly coming to the decision that I didn't want to repair our marriage, but now I'm sure I want to let her go. Yes, we've had many good times, raised three awesome kids together, and we used to proclaim our undying love for each other. But just thinking about all the disrespect she's showed me over the years makes me realize I don't want to live with that any longer. I'm looking forward to a life of freedom in my retirement, hopefully with lots more great outdoor adventures with my kids and with the new friends I plan on making.
I'd rather not feel compelled to move out of our apartment to physically separate to keep my sanity, because the view is beautiful and I love it here. I'm hoping my wife and I can at least live together on friendly terms as we had originally planned (we'll see how that goes when she returns Friday from her visit to her best [female] friend). If that doesn't work, I'm hoping she moves in with her "boyfriend" if they're actually still an item, but I think he might be married so that may not happen.
