I’m glad you sought medical diagnosis and treatment, and that your’s and D20’s symptoms have quelled.
Originally Posted by Rockon
I had asked D if she let her mom know. She said no and I left it.
I agree with what you did. You asked, and listened to and followed daughter’s wishes.
I look at it as rights and privileges.
When one’s kids are young, minors, under 18, dependents, parents/legal guardians have a right to know about children’s welfare. That’s parents with share custody. With my XW’s demanded removal of her responsibilities, and in writing (twice) stating that I am to have sole custody of our children, she relinquished her rights. Anyhow, after 18 years of age, those “parental” rights become privileges.
Adult “children”, have rights to their privacy. That privacy includes medical treatments and history, medical problems, their finances, who they vote for, decision to join the army, choice to move, to attend family gatherings or not, and so on; rights just as any adult has.
Parents have privileges bestowed by their adult child. If your child speaks with you, keeps you informed, calls when they get hurt, asked for advice during a medical situation, seeks your input when buying a house, and such; it’s because they want to, not because they have to. They are extending privileges, not rights.
Daughter called you and her BF. Both D20 and BF came over for supper after all was calm. This whole situation is a good indicator that you are doing a pretty darn good job, IMHO. Life does provide feedback.
Do not tarnish or take for granted your privileges. Honour and respect them.
D
Feelings are fleeting. Be better, not bitter. Love the person, forgive the sin.
