I’m guessing the close friend was close to both you and W. I’d let W know of the Mother’s passing, and that you are attending the service. Say nothing of your wants or wishes for her to attend or to not attend. Let W decide her course and do what she will.
I’m six years passed BD. XW and I have nothing to do in each other’s lives. Still, I’d notify her upon the death of one of my parents. I’d not prevent her from paying her respects, if she felt she would like to. She was a daughter to them, they were parents to her, for 30 years.
Perhaps, your W would want to pay her respects. Or perhaps not. I’d let her have agency to determine that.
Have a great Sunday.
D
Feelings are fleeting. Be better, not bitter. Love the person, forgive the sin.
