Thanks for your replies! Posting here is therapeutic. I don't really have anyone to talk to, but I could seek a variety of counseling options for myself through my employer if I want it.
I'm not sure how to become less available without moving out. I've been working from home since Covid. My routine has been to do a number of things for her every day, e.g. getting her car warmed up and ready for her to leave in the morning. I've been doing this because I enjoy doing things to help her. However I could move my work area to my "Man Cave" in the back if necessary. Currently I'm out front all day every day, the first thing she sees when she comes in the door, and in the same room as her in the evening when she's watching TV.
Today was a tough day. I've been feeling anger over my perception of her ingratitude and her total indifference to how she's ruining my life right now. Sometimes I feel so ready to leave and start my life over but am not sure how to take that step.
