We were at a large bar, and despite having 0 interest in women now, I decided to have a little fun and run some old 'game'. It was all goofy innocent conversation stuff. I left with 3 phone numbers. Again, I have no interest, but my friends were egging me on, and it felt good to know that I could still do it.
This is why the dating scene is a mess right now. Everyone is seeking validation to make themselves feel better. These women will become angry and take it out on other men. The cycle continues and the mess gets bigger. Innocent fun? think again.
Women already take everything out on men. It's been that way since 1968 and has gotten worse ever since.
Married: 15yrs Ages: Me 49, W 44 Kids: S12 BD: around 4/14
Hi all. It's been a few weeks, so thought I'd chime in.
I guess there's not much to update. Divorce is proceeding, and our house will be listed next week.
I"m not sure if everything's 'hit me' yet, or if I'm kinda 'over it'. Maybe both.
I've been keeping pretty busy. Aside from getting the house ready, I've been going out w/ friends, doing some hobbies, spending time w/ son, etc. I know it's not a smart thing to do, and it's certainly not a goal of mine, but I seem to meet a new woman every time I go out.
W and I are still civil to each other. A friend of ours owns a small restaurant and I played acoustic there Saturday evening. W and another friend went out 'day drinking', and stopped in the restaurant about 7 hours into their binge. I'm still not sure why, but whatever. They stayed about 45 minutes then were on their way to the next bar.
Anyway, that's about it. Sorry I haven't had much time to read/post on other's posts lately. Things have been crazy at work too, which I guess is good. Still hard to believe that probably within a month, our family will be officially broken up. I'm gonna need a nice vacation after all of this!
Married: 15yrs Ages: Me 49, W 44 Kids: S12 BD: around 4/14
“I know it's not a smart thing to do, and it's certainly not a goal of mine, but I seem to meet a new woman every time I go out.”
Do you want to talk more about this here? What’s not smart about meeting new people every time? Is that not your intention? Is it that they are women? What are your fears? Is this a problem?
I know it's not a smart thing to do, and it's certainly not a goal of mine, but I seem to meet a new woman every time I go out.
It is perfectly fine as long as your intentions are not to become sexually or romantically involved. I am sure your ego has been hit like the rest of us at BD and it is nice to get some interteraction with the opposite sex. Maintaining your boundaries will make you even more desirable.
During my single time after BD, I would be dancing with one woman which made me more desirable with the other ladies sitting watching. Pretty easy to move from one dance partner to the next lady. Was practicing finding and maintaining eye contact with potential next dance partner. I always knew who wanted to dance next.
"What is best for my kids is best for me" Amor Fati Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
R2C that’s so funny. Way to work the room 😁The ladies must have gone nuts haha. Terapin thanks for the update I hope it all goes as smoothly as possible for you, although your emotions would be all over the place. I am completely with you I am just not in a place to meet someone. Far from it. I do worry sometimes and wonder if I ever will. Despite detaching now I just feel too wounded and honestly afraid. Time apparently heals all.
M:41 H:48 T:20. M:16.5 BD: 15/12/22 -moved out 17/3/2023
The obvious answer is no. Within the next month I'll be moving, and essentially starting a whole new life. It's going to be a helluva transition. It'll be months before I get settled into a routine.
But on the other hand, W BD'd me back in like April. We haven't slept in the same bed, or had ANY physical contact since last September. So even though BD was still somewhat surprising, honestly the M has been dead for a long time. And, a man does have needs. Not just sexual. But just feeling wanted, attractive, etc.
I always had the theory that you'll be hung up on 'this one' until the 'next one' comes along. Even if it's not a relationship, dating, sex, or anything. Just someone else to help occupy some of the space your ex took up in your mind.
Married: 15yrs Ages: Me 49, W 44 Kids: S12 BD: around 4/14
It’s time for a rebound. Everyone keeps saying rebounds are healthy.A confidence boost, a distraction, some harmless fun, sexual etc. In no way will it fix everything and make you magically happier instantly, but at least it’s moving forward or In any direction. It may take a while until you’re ready to be in a healthy relationship again. Only you know that. This is very destroying to someone’s heart and soul and we can’t love again with a wounded heart. So take the time to heal your wounded heart. And maybe some harmless fun can help
M:41 H:48 T:20. M:16.5 BD: 15/12/22 -moved out 17/3/2023
It’s time for a rebound. Everyone keeps saying rebounds are healthy. A confidence boost, a distraction, some harmless fun, sexual etc.
You may have some homework to do if you believe this statement.
I don't know if they're healthy or unhealthy. What I do know is that nearly everyone has them, at least in some capacity.
I guess it's ideal to wait months or even years to work on yourself, get over the last relationship, etc, and then consider dating someone. But I don't always think that's realistic either.
Married: 15yrs Ages: Me 49, W 44 Kids: S12 BD: around 4/14
