Way Less Lost!! Pt 4

[Pattnee5]

I do have to keep reminding myself. As human, there are fleeting moments where I question myself and do get quite hard on myself wondering if there’s any truth to all his words and actions and was it that bad. It’s hard when they distort the reality and actually make us believe it. Then I remember our real reality and history and can easily see his crisis mode. This isn’t the same man, and if this “new man” is the one that is hanging around for the next 40years it certainly isn’t the one I want to grow old with that’s for sure. I always thought I would be growing old with H. Now I can see it was the old H not this new version of H. The same way we loved who they were not who they are transforming into becoming( whether it be permanent or temporary) I am open to still loving H in the future should he emerge out of this but it will depend who he is, where his values and morals lie, and he would have to be 110% all in. I refuse to ever put myself through this again by merely “settling”