Midlife March Madness

[Pattnee5]

I’m so sorry to hear about your sadness URSO. I’m in the same boat and know how it feels. I stood for 9 months and lived in limbo and H constantly just coasting along and not doing any of his own work or work to relationship. I too decided to “give him what he wants” and instigated legal talks again after he was just throwing the words around. He had a hissy fit and decided to take a job relocation on the other side of the globe. So I know what that sadness feels today, the fact we couldn’t stand anymore. But there comes a point where we have to turn our focus on ourselves and put ourselves first instead of putting our messed up spouses first.
It sounds like your W is also having her version of a hissy fit by making your life difficult with lawyers. They hate losing control. I can see that now. H hates that I had said “let’s legalise this separation sell the house and go our seperate ways and coparent”. H decided “nope I need to cause maximum damage time to flee because I don’t like this”. I’m not sure if your W is in MLC mode too but it really is a sad state of mind
I think you need to remember that out of all of this we are the success. We have stood, we have grown we have evolved and we were not the ones who ended the marriage and walked away. They did at BD, and they also did every single day when we would give 100% effort to save and stand and they would give 0%. We are the success. It’s okay to be sad after making the right decision