XH is having OW2 and their child staying over for ten days. My goodness that will be a surprise for those who don’t know.
I agree, the wee baby and XH’s responsibilities are both a draw and pressure to him. Reconciling his duties, being in people’s/kid’s lives, is going to be something he will have to figure out.
His awareness and regret of his poisonous behaviour, and yet his unwillingness and/or inability to alter his course, highlights his still inner turmoil. Much like the start of the crisis, when it (replay) starts winding down it has the MLCer living in two worlds again. He has to figure himself out. And depression is still ever present.
Absolutely, remain out of the middle of all this.
This is exactly what I have done until present. EXH came with the baby to my house yesterday to meet with our boys and I decided not to be present as this is something between them. They are old enough. They were pretty nervous and didn't feel like wanting to deal with this but they really wanted to see the little boy so they did. Afterwards they told me it was very confusing to see their dad with another child but they liked the baby, however they want to leave it at that for now. They clearly see he's back to where he was about 1,5 year ago and are fed up with it.
Last week and this week we are making the necessary preparations for S19 who goes to University at the end of the month. We are preparing his place as he will be living on his own during the week in the city where he will be studying. Great experience by the way. My FIL is a big help, EXH didn't do anything and did not ask to help. (2 weeks ago completely the opposite, was planning to help out etc., now nothing anymore)
The awareness and regret have made place again for zero emotions and compassion towards me and the children. The only thing that counts are his feelings and the newborn child, which is his everything at the moment. Really strange to see this being completely turned again. I don't actually have contact with him, only sometimes a message and these are first very polite and 2 minutes later very controlling and a the least to say quite harsh. If so, I don't react or I tell him to stop this behavior.
I'm assuming OW2 will remain here at his place or will return shortly to pick up her stuff with the intention to come over and live here with him. I don't feel comfortable at all with this (it used to be most of the times abroad, so far away, but his time it will be very close if she decides to be again in an R with him)
But unfortunately I don't have any control over it, hopefully I will get used to the idea and situation soon.
Originally Posted by DnJ
one son an adult, and the other two 16 years old - hey are they driving yet? Gosh, practicing driving with two boys at the same time. Busy times for you. And stressful too. I remember all those many hours of teaching, and stress, and struggle. And looking back, I love every minute of it!
In my country you are only allowed to drive as from the age of 18 so still 2 years to go for the twins. The eldest however had his lessons and has to go for his test in 2 weeks time. Hopefully he will succeed!
And looking back, I love every minute of it!
