Way Less Lost!! Pt 4

[Pattnee5]

I am not sure if this happens to anyone else but everyone tells me I should unlesh angry words at H and defend myself. My own mother keeps asking me if I’m scared of him(which I am not at all)
H will say all this stuff to “blame” me and skew history and the past, and I just don’t speak up or defend myself or correct him. Maybe it’s indirectly DB maybe it’s me just thinking “what’s the use he’s not listening”. But then in private on my own I have so many angry words and stuff to say to him which I just journal in my phones notes instead. Correcting him on so many of his words etc. I still feel disappointed in him as a person that he has chosen to run, this man is so weak that he looks at this whole situation as “too much hard work so let me just leave and go and start a whole new life”. In one aspect I just want to unleash everything at him before he goes, or send him with a letter with all my pent up anger and words, but again what’s the use. The reality is he is abandoning everyone not me. I don’t know why I just don’t get angry or go off at him face to face and I don’t know why I am so calm and just let him say stuff and don’t defend myself