Second roller coaster ride (part 3)

[Card29]

I went to a music festival yesterday. I hadn't had any "mind altering" substances since BD, but I decided to have an edible. Normally they make me relaxed and happy, but this time it was not a good time. My friend said it will typically emphasize whatever mood you're in. I guess I was subconsciously thinking of W. For a couple hours, every girl I saw looked like W, or someone else related to us, like in-laws or shared friends. I haven't been feeling the emotions of the situation lately, but after my last grief support class, I know it's coming. There's a lot of pent up sadness and anger that I will need to face. I certainly felt a lot of it last night.

No more upcoming plans to do something like that again. I'll continue to not drink when I go out with friends.

On a positive note, I saw an artist that I've wanted to see for the last 5 years. He did not disappoint, one of the best shows I've ever seen. So that music is boosting my mood today.

Also, word is finally spreading in W's extended family. I've had one of her cousins reach out, I'm sure others will. Keeping contact with them to a minimum.