Way Less Lost!! Pt 4

[Pattnee5]

Yeah I do think that Card.
I also think what if in sept 2024 he is still living this limbo, coming and going, unsure of what he wants , still angry, still drinking still hating his life and job etc. it really isn’t a great life for me and the kids. Limbo is horrible despite needing to “be the lighthouse”.
I think I needed to do this, to push him out into his “seperated” life. And in his hissy fit state he has knee jerk reacted to relocate to the other side of the world ( run Forrest run)
For a very very smart man who has always been logical and has friends who have depression and has encouraged them to seek help and counselling in the past, he sure has done a backflip and doesn’t practice what he preached. Not even a single IC session, not a single self help book, new hobby, anything to pull himself out of this unhappiness, just rather run as far away as he can.
I know if he never lives this reality he will forever hold it against us and always have in his head “ I should have left I should have done it “
There’s no way we can ever have a healthy strong relationship unless he lives his reality and the concequences. They say that you don’t know what you had until it’s gone. Let’s hope this is just his wake up call( or else his complete spiral into a forever broken man)

I’ve been quite numb the last few days. Moreso trying to plan my life moving forward. I know my heart will break the day he leaves for good so I’ll just work on strengthening it for the next few months in preparation