My sister had some advice for me regarding talking to my mom. She said all of us in our family and extended family suffer from not setting boundaries, from oversharing (I just admitted to this in a post in this morning, so she's spot on). She said I don't have to tell her anything beyond the necessary right now. That W is unhappy and we're separating right now and working through some things. And she also suggested set a boundary - "I'll share more later when I'm ready, but right now I need some space and would like to keep this within our family for now".
She also told me that her and my mom have talked about mom's issues before. Mom admits she still wants to operate like we're her children (S38, D36, D35) and not adults. It explains a lot. She over buys, over helps, over provides. I think W has felt trampled by this, like she is an unworthy W, step-mom and mom. If that's really my mom's mindset, she doesn't want someone marrying and supporting her child, supplanting her role. This is gross to think about, but I have to know.
Last edited by Card29; 08/22/2302:27 PM.
Me 38, WAW 30 D11 (former marriage) S2 T 8 years M 3 years BD 8/20/23 S 8/20/23
