Hey P, it is typical MLC behavior to say things but never act on anything. They want one thing today and tomorrow it's not that but something else. I lived this for almost 3 years with H's initial MLC. He never left, slept on the couch, did not participate much in family life at all.
I decided back then to stand for my marriage bar none. It was incredibly difficult, so often you have to bite your tongue, stay calm, not bring up ANYTHING about R. Eventually, it gets easier because you detach from him. If you love him and you want your marriage back, stay focused on you, leave him to himself. I know you've been doing that but sometimes all the emotions inside us just boil over and we get angry and demand a discussion about R issues. Don't let yourself get emotional! I regreted it every time afterwards because it made everything worse, and I felt worse. It is not worth it, just let go. Be kind to him, ask him how his day was or any other general question. You don't want to get sucked in.
If HE brings up divorce talk try to change the subject. And if that does not work be vague, tell him you need to think about ... and leave it at that. The purpose is to delay, delay, delay, he's in no state of mind to be making life altering decisions right now. Of course he doesn't know that, and by all means, don't tell him that! He is basing all of this on the way he's been feeling inside, and he thinks that divorce and what not will make it all better. It won't because you are not at the root of his problems. He needs time to figure this all out on his own.
Time is of the essence here, and without an incredible amount of patience you will not succeed. But first, you will have to make the decision to stand or not stand. You have the right to file for divorce yourself if you feel you've had enough and you want to move on with your life. Totally understandable. ((Hugs))
