I get that R2C. I had been refraining from bringing up W here but I am wanting to come here and talking about this stuff instead of keeping it to myself and impulsively acting out emotionally.
I was dealing well with W’s absence and focusing and following through on my path. And now I have been finding W’s contact to be intrusive and potentially destabilizing for me. Therefore I am doing what it takes to stay on my path. Following though on my clarified values.
Reflecting on the interactions I have had with her while she’s away, what I’ve been doing well: 24-48 hr rule responding when it makes sense for me when I’m ready and when it’s important STFU Acknowledge and validate others emotional state No R talks no pressure not initiating GAL
Not so well: I’ve been experiencing some emotional distress at W’s contact and having some challenges disciplining my mind and choosing my thought track and influencing my own well being - actually as I this that out maybe I’m doing this pretty well.
As far as working on those skills without getting a gf, R2C, I have been doing that. Yes with the party etc that has been appropriately intensive with family, guests etc with focus on S22 - btw didn’t bring W at all in those settings and circles. But I got right back to focusing on Rock, GAL with new friend group : mixed of various ages and yes being friendly and fun and walking away from W not giving the signal that I want to date. Community health for me. And social skills.
