MLC monster has caught up with me again..

[Pattnee5]

Hi Love, wow this breaks my heart to hear. I too have been in your shoes except without the “initial crisis” although thinking back 9 years ago now maybe my H did have a mini crisis as he exhibited strange avoidance behaviours very similar to now.
I am about 7 months in from BD and I know these feeling all too well. My H took 3 months to move out was flipping back and forward saying he’s confused unsure wanting hugs and cuddles and kisses then running for the hills. I think DnJ even threw in a “clinging boomerang “ type which was so typical. I clung to hope like a madwoman cried every day hardly slept or ate and have read every google article I think. Recently I have sort of turne a corner. H told me he is speaking to lawyers and wants to proceed, has been very standoffish and recently told me he is going for a 10 day work trip but 6 days of it s a holiday( while I’ve had the kids 7 days a week for 7 months)
That was the mail in my coffin and now I feel a weight off me. Everyone told me it will get better and slowly it has. I have been doing alot of DB and a lot less hoping and praying for reconciliation.
I think until you realise you just have to let him be and let him sleep in the bed he’s made, it’s going to be alot of pain and hurt and tears. Take care of yourself. Time is definitely your friend. I am starting to get better and for more inspiration check out MA on newcomers who is kicking serious goals. I am far from doing anything perfect nor have I the last few months but it’s almost like I woke up one day and thought “ right this is happening. This isn’t me, this is all him I am not to blame”
Everyone mentioned the likelihood of an affair I was adamant there wasn’t but now I am seriously convinced there’s another woman. Doesn’t matter if he doesn’t leave the house online is dangerous. For me a telltale sign has been the fact that no sane man would not want to work on problems in a marriage and to at least fix a marriage if there’s a third party involved. Another wise DB told me this. I’m not going snooping or to confirm though because I feel the less I know the better
I can also say one cool thing I read today. “One day you will laugh at the fact you cried over him, or cringe. Either way you win”