In your defense you are getting conflicting advice.
Just more options on the choices one can make. What worked for one person can backfire for another, and vise-versa. Each of us have to evaluate the choices, make a decision, and live with consequences of that choice.
Waiting is a good first option. But that should have a time frame. For one person, that might be a month. For another, 6 months. Some 1 year. While waiting, you focus on making positive change to yourself. One change at a time. My changes are different than another persons changes. But, most of us that arrive here have common issues that should be addressed.
On the other hand, waiting looses respect and does not increase attraction. It also allows cake eating.
Some here will tell you to go left, while others will tell you to go right. I believe you should have the skills to go completely left, completely right, or anyplace in between, and immediately change as needed. Do this in all areas. Just don't go in circles. That doesn't work.
"What is best for my kids is best for me" Amor Fati Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
