I have been having some conversations with my financial planner getting my portfolio updated and tidied up and gaining more understanding. I also will talk to L about some questions.
DnJ you said:
“ After her living away for a year I think she has lost the right to tell you, direct you, how thrifty you need to be. Ensure you pay your share of joint expenses, and the rest is your’s to do with as you choose. And yes, giving no response was perfect”
As we have talked about on these boards, for a period of time our financial arrangement had been working reasonably and I did not see a reason to change it. That time may have arrived for the reason that I need more autonomy and privacy from W’s input and interference.
I am considering stating that I will contribute 50% to our shared mortgage and house insurance costs and I will look after my own personal and household expenses. Considering. I don’t know of that’s the right way to go.
Therapist recommended that once W returns from overseas, I tell her, “I will need to make some decisions for me and our family. What are you willing to do? Will you work on the M? I am interested to hear your plans?”
Does this sound like an ultimatum? I don’t want to force or accelerate an outcome I don’t want. I do want to move forward in healthy ways for myself and our family. And I want to be true to what’s important here regardless of outcome. In reality the bad has already happened. We do not have a M relationship whatsoever. The old one is done.
