A little less lost? Pt 3

[DnJ]

Hello Patt

I feel so guilty and like a DB failure ( which I need to admit to you guys here) because I still have hope our paths will cross again and we can have a fresh start in a fresh marriage as two new people. I still have hope in years to come he may just re-align with me and I know that goes against everything in this 🫣😭

Hope is not failure. Hope is an incredible wellspring of strength and fortitude. Hope is timeless.

Expectations is hope with a timeframe or deadline upon it. And nothing kills hope faster than a deadline. (Dead, it’s in the name - deadline.) Keep your hope. Do not let anyone take away your hope.

Do realize, hope can ensnare someone as well. One can get paralyzed in hope. Become stagnate and unmoving and un-living. So hope, while continuing to move forward.

To be accurate, that stuck in hope is more living in denial masquerading as being hopeful. I suspect you’ll be able to avoid that outcome by knowing about it.

By the way, your hopes will likely alter, grow, and evolve as you heal and grow. Hopes becoming more belief and convictions than thought and feelings. Personally, I believe having hope is perfectly aligned with DB.

I too am finding this is the absolute worst pain I have ever experienced…

it’s just that feeling in my heart like it physically hurts

Oh my how I remember that. Yes, the absolute worse pain ever experienced! Heartbreak, withdrawal, such incredible physical manifestations of pain. One’s psyche “feels” in the chest area. A hurt psyche - like a lost love, and one’s heart hurts.

At the moment I am struggling within myself and hating myself A LOT for my infidelity 9 years ago.

P, this is a path you’ve got to walk. Find your peace with this. Forgive yourself. (((Hug)))

D