I’m still so lost -Pt 2

[Sunflyer]

Hi Patnee:

You really do describe well what it can be like to deal with this. The word is "alien."

Your story and DnJ's are shocking and heartbreaking to read. I don't have anything to compare, really. I don't know if my wife is experiencing MLC. But I do see that this is not the person I've loved, not the person I married.

The person I loved wrote me that her marriage vows mattered with the utmost of seriousness. That she would not leave me unless I wanted her to go. That we could work through messes. That is all forgotten now.

The person I loved had a cheerful "Hi!" for me everyday. Now I never hear that. She still gives me a smile now and then; at other times she stares as I walk by, as if I were stalking her.

The person I loved would not throw family photographs into the trash, because they represented happier times in our relationship, like our engagement and wedding. Now she has done that, even if I am not in the photographs. Photographs of her aunts and uncles. Of her with her late grandmother, whom she adored. I saved some of those photos from the trash, when she was not aware.

The person I loved would not speak to my own family behind my back about our problems, especially when I told her not to. Now she has my younger sister telling her that she can "do better" than me.

I am sure that, like the others who have told you their stories, you probably worked hard for your husband. Pulled the moon down from the sky for him. Believed he would be there for you when it got hard, not just when it was easy, instead of running away.

Now, regardless of what happens, you are grabbing that moon down from the sky, for you. You deserve whatever happiness you can create for yourself. May the future smile on you and grant you peace.