Learning the ropes 2

[MA1970]

Thanks so much DnJ & Kind. I do feel I'm getting the hang of this now.

There has been more shenanigans yesterday (our 21st anniversary). Surprisingly, I wasn't upset by the date at all & didn't really spend much time thinking about it. However, H came round unexpectedly. He stayed for around 90mins. Said he was there because he didn't want it to be awkward at D's prom pics. It wouldn't have been awkward anyway!

H started saying he wanted to acknowledge the date (our anniversary). He apologised for not contacting me on my birthday in May and said he hadn't known what to do. He's going for IC and seems to find this helpful. He told me a little about it & I think they've got him spot on - avoidant personality stemming from abandonment issues in childhood. I told him I was really pleased he was having therapy and this will really help him be a different person in his relationship with OW. He said he could tell I've worked on me & I'm a different person. I agreed and said it's good that we can both be different within our next relationships. H then teared up saying he doesn't like me talking about future relationships. He still cares about me etc etc. I validated his feelings saying we had a lot of years yogether and it's understandable he would feel like he does. He then asked me directly if I still cared about him. I said I do care, you're the father of our children and we had a lot of happy years together. It's sad that it hasn't worked out but I hope we can both have happy futures. There was a lot of other stuff said. Him, asking me days and dates when I'm going out etc. I was calm throughout & happy with how I conducted myself but also noticed that it really didn't affect me. When he went to leave, he pulled me into a cuddle & hung on for grim death. He said I smelt nice & I just didn't reply. Said goodbye & genuinely felt OK. He text on the night to say it was really good to see & speak to me today. I didn't reply but will be seeing him again today for prom pics. No idea what's going on & don't really care either. Just odd after a few months of no contact & then this past weekend where he basically moved back into house to catsit without permission (he also apologised about that & I asked him to seek permission in the future because it is no longer his home)

It's all a bit odd, like DnJ said, possibly a bit of a lot of things. I'm not reading anything into it though. Today is about my baby girl having the best day at her prom