Yeah, that's something that's hard for me to come to terms with. Like, for years we've struggled financially, plus with our son growing up, we didn't have a lot of opportunity for trips, vacations, dinners, etc. It's like, we've stuck together through the 'hard part', and now she wants out just as things have drastically improved. lol.
I somewhat relate to this. We didn't really "struggle" financially, even when she was making substantially less than me, but I would say that's because I was managing the finances. Ironically, she works in the financial sector but has never been great with money at home. Post-D, I can totally see her needing to rely on daddy to bail her out when she regularly goes over budget and runs the credit card bill into the stratosphere. (He's done this before, and he also bailed out the side business she runs with her brother after their first two non-profitable years).
She can basically forget being able to retire now; so can I. The big difference is that I have a job I love and can continue to have a good life with including substantial time off. She currently remains chained to a job I don't think she really enjoys anymore. She was on the verge of leaving until they offered her a huge raise and some concessions. Plus her office moved to a new building that doubled her commute time. (She had an offer in hand for a job less than ten minutes away).
Making that Faustian bargain was part of what has made her less accessible to me and our boys (part of her contribution to getting us where we are, that I'm not sure she comprehends).
Me 59 W 47 T 26 M 23 S18, S14 BD May 2023 D filed June 2023 OM1 confirmed: December 2023 OM2 confirmed: October 2023
