Weekly check in. I hope its OK to do these? It just feels like I have some accountability & a chance to get pulled up on anything that might need tweaking. I hope at some point to have some wisdom to help others at the start of their journey too. Not quite there yet though!
GAL activity - going regularly to the gym & I've now worked out a routine for myself. Had friends round on Friday night & we agreed to book an open lake water swim when I'm back from hols. I never would have done this previously because I would have been too body conscious. I've lost a lot if weight since BD in Feb but am also of the opinion "who cares" if I want to try it then I should. I've been online chatting to an old friend (male) from many years ago. This has been nice & we facetimed last week. We live in different countries but its nice to reconnect. On Saturday, I went out with girlfriends to a cocktail bar. We stayed with the owner after hours for a lock in and I was dancing and having fun. It was nice to have some male attention. I'm definitely still of the opinion though that I need to feel comfortable in my own company before any future relationships.
Detaching- this is getting easier. H is still no contact but I had to message him last week because our video doorbell needed a code for me to use on my new phone. I asked H to transfer to me but he wouldn't & just gave me the code. Equally, he is still avoiding giving me my front door key back. I'm not rising to his games & plan to get the locks changed on the house. I still get very upset that he has chosen OW over me but I'm confident this does not reflect on my looks, personality or values. It reflects on his need to escape from himself. I'm sure I'll have more bad days to come but this week has been good.
Once again, thanks for all the guidance. On the good days, its good. On the bad days, I just take it one hour at a time and know that I can choose to be different in the next hour.
