6 months of uncertainties.

[Terapin]

Hi Orange. Thx for the kind words in my thread. Yep, [censored] we're going through this. I'd just like to give a couple of thoughts.

As far as I know, nobody on this planet is perfect. Everybody has done things they regret, everybody has taken their marriage/spouse for granted at one point or another, etc. I think about stupid things I've said and done over the years and it makes me sick. But for every example I can think of, I can also think of 1 or 2 (or 10) examples of my W saying or doing something even worse. Again, nobody's perfect. And who would want to be with someone that is 'perfect'? So don't beat yourself up too much about stuff you regret. Guaranteed your W has her regrets too, although she may never admit them to you.

I'll drink alcohol once every week or two, although I do drink too much on some of those occassions. W could probably be considered an alkie, as she drinks literally every night. But I don't blame you for having resentments about her drinking, especially as it relates to the kids. One time when our son was around 5 or 6, I got completely hammered and couldn't get off the couch the next day. I felt so bad when my son wanted to play all day, and I just couldn't. I vowed never to let that happen again. On the other hand, W has no issues with sleeping till noon on the weekends. Fortunately our son is old enough now to entertain himself, but when he was younger, my W's drinking/sleeping was a big problem for me. Regardless of your relationship status, your W needs to realize that kind of stuff is unacceptable. Hopefully it was just a one time thing.

GAL is the most difficult thing for most of us, especially when we have kids. Every time I go out and do something, I feel like I'm abandoning my kid or something. But as others will tell you, it needs to be done. Hell, even play 9 holes of golf after work or something. Not only will that give you a break, it'll 'force' your W to handle the kids alone, perhaps thinking of what life will be without you?