Sorry to hear about this. Your wife has been demonstrating typical WW behavior. It is quite likely that when you discovered her affair, her EA was already wearing out or she was on the verge of getting dumped. It is highly unlikely that she will readily agree to working on the MR without something unobvious at play. Maybe she is just bidding time until another affair materializes. Will need further observation, but most importantly you need to DB. Read the Lighthouse story asap, practice detachment and GAL like your live depends on it.
Can you tell us more about yourself and your family - ages, children, and you MR so far etc.
