My Story

[Ready2Change]

I have put the ring in my pocket and put it on after leaving for work. I wear it when she is not around.

I believe this is perfectly ok for the short term.

In the big picture, you are worried about how SHE will respond to you wearing the ring. This is one of the biggest hurdles new posters have. They are focused on how their spouse is behaving and/or responding etc.


Now is the time to question everything you believe. Digging deep is important.
Compartmentalize everything.

Women test their men. It is an ongoing process, and it may be subconscious to her. Your goal is to pass the tests. Most of us arrive here failing all the tests.

Think about this statement:
"How can he protect me when he will not even stand up to me?"

Jordan Peterson talks about "Slaying the dragon". Another good talk is about "Beauty and the Beast". Take some time and listen to JP.


Back to the ring. You have your current beliefs on why/when you should /shouldn't wear it. Now is the time to question all of the beliefs you have around it.

From this point on, it is none of her business on why/why not you are wearing it. SHE HAS FIRED YOU as her husband. You make your decision and keep the reasons private.

Wear it if you want to project that you are standing for the marriage. Take it off the day the paperwork is signed.

Do not wear it. Show her that you are supporting her decision even though you disagree with it.

Wear it so that other woman know you are not on the market. "The LAST thing I need in my life right now is ANOTHER woman. Things are complicated enough already."




It is critical that you get ahead of her in this process. Everything she will do is scripted out. How you behave during this process MAY effect her.

She has lost her attraction for you. Changing your behavior is the only way to attract her back. Most get this wrong and do it to slowly.


How soon are you ready to support your wife and ask "How soon can you move out?"

These are two of my mantras:
"I don't want to be with a woman who does not want to be with me."
"I do not share my woman with other men."

Makes it pretty easy to make decisions have a good set of mantras. Start working on yours.

Stockdale paradox:
“You must never confuse faith that you will prevail in the end—which you can never afford to lose—with the discipline to confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.” — Admiral James Stockdale.

Face the brutal fact that you are going to be divorced. Have faith that your changes will give you the best chance at saving the marriage. She may like what she sees and have a change of heart.