My Story

[Sunflyer]

Hi Ready2Change and thank you for the input!

A few quick follow ups.

First 180 is to focus on being Dad. Give W space. 17yo may want space from you as well. Friends are more important at this age for most. 13yo might be willing for dad time.

Yup. The 17 year old's world is his friends right now. I didn't mention that he is going away to college in the fall, and I know that is weighing on my wife's mind. How much it impacts her feelings about our relationship I don't know.

Most of us arrive here with that belief. Hope for the best, but prepare for the worst. Even if she has been faithful up to this point, odds are she is ready.

She is one of those people who has said (multiple times), "If you ever cheat on me, I will kill you." Considering how long she has known me, I figure she should know that cheating is not in my vocabulary. I will admit it has started to cross my mind that perhaps she who proclaims the loudest is trying to compensate for something.

Put your needs on hold. Focus on your attraction and your seduction. There is a big difference between these two. Understand the difference. Do some reading (or other means of research) and learn some "new moves" for bedroom time. Do not be boring.

I did try a "new move" that she told me in advance that she liked. She enjoyed it a lot but seemed to lose interest pretty quickly. I will take your advice, while hoping that there is actually "bedroom time" again at some future point.

The rules have now changed. No more R talks. This is now poker. Do not reveal your cards. You only have the three reasons above and parenting for discussions with her.

There hasn't been anything on the topic for over a week at this point, from either me or her. Conversations on the other topics seem to be returning to normal.

Learn the art of dirty talk as well. Might be awhile before you can use it, but get it in your new set of tools.

This is in both of our toolboxes already.

Perfect. Keep this up.

I will, and I'm moving forward doing activities that I like to make MYSELF happy, although at this stage it still feels a bit "artificial." After all, she complained that I wasn't paying her enough attention. Now I have to back off and give her room. But I know that clinging and smothering are the worst things I could do right now.