So I’ll ask the question. What changes if there is an affair? What happened to validating her feelings instead of being argumentative? Was this a common theme in your short marriage? Why can’t it be amicable? Would making it not amicable bring you closer to your goal or further away?
It would allow me to detach further if there was an affair. It helps to stop idealizing the person. I can not justify cheating, ever.
There was no common theme as there was no good amount of time in marriage.
Whenever I try to show empathy towards her or try to maintain warm communication on D or other topics, I get negative responses. Especially if there is something I can not fully agree with. I want it to be amicable. It would definitely help with my goal of trying to be a decent human being and (ex-)husband.
It would be nice if all those years were remembered as good memories rather than hurtful ending/times.
