Originally Posted by Kind18
Being detached isn’t a definitive line in the sand, where you can suddenly say you’ve done it.

It’s a slow, gradual process. You’ll never be completely without this person. They’re part of your history.

I knew I was detached when I began to feel sorry for my ex. At that point, I knew that none of her dumb decisions and outcomes were my problem. I could simultaneously feel sad for the complete train wreck of her life and future, but happily walk with my kids in the complete opposite direction.

Interesting smile What do you consider dumb decisions?

We had another discussion yesterday with STBXW. Nothing has changed, she has no feelings, wants to quit asap and feels that she was not herself for the entire stint of our relationship. Basically, she is done and nothing will change that. She even said herself that she knew how much marriage & family meant to me and still decided to quit as "we never had a chance". Hearing these words no longer hurts as much as before. I only wish she would have pulled the plug before the wedding.

I have to continue my own path and move on. I heard a beautiful line lately:

It's about become the right person, not finding one. Hopefully I can take my lessons from this, become better and create a true loving family.