I’m still so lost -Pt 2

[Pattnee5]

Night ended up ok and I feel ok with today. Had another message later in the day saying again how genuinely sorry H was for yesterdays outburst and had even bought me chocolates to apologise.
I was still working. Said he was feeling better and didn’t need alone time and asked about possibly having dinner together. I politely declined and said I would prefer some time to myself tonight. I was genuinely exhausted and emotionally drained and didn’t want to put on a fake happy “fake it u til you make it” facade. He acknowledged my response and said he understood and would go for a walk and touch base tomorrow
I feel alot
Calmer now. I genuinely just wanted to breathe today. Had my brother over instead and had a laugh instead. Far more relaxed than playing fake house. I feel I am getting stronger slightly
I know H is not in a good place within dealing with his own emotion but I also know he needs to be the one to fix himself and get himself out of this hole in order
For it to actually work. If I try to drag him through my ways he will revert in no time. I think the anger and feeling emotion is going to do him the world
Of
Good if he learns to harness it. The same way I am learning to harness my emotions too and my patience
Goodness it’s a slog isn’t it.
Hopefully a good weekend ahead