You played it almost perfectly. Seriously - well done MA.
The problem here is that you are trying to connect how “well” you behave as to whether he’s coming back or not.
What people say and do has VERY little to do with the decisions a wayward husband makes.
You could have slammed the door in his face. You could have hugged him. You could have been super validating and supportive.
Stop trying to connect what you do or say to whether he decides to come back or not, because it makes zero difference. People with APs are like drug addicts. You can’t make them see sense, they make erratic decisions, they’ll promise the world but deliver nothing.
He is on a journey which needs to run its course.
You’re a passenger on this train ride, not the train driver.
In a few year’s time you’ll look back on how you handled this conversation and feel pride.
You need to see an IC to get some help with emotional resilience so that the highs and lows aren’t such extremes for you.
