These crap interactions will continue… because you keep interacting with her.
Your number 1 goal should be to STOP all interactions.
The crux of this problem is that she can keep coming and going and taking stuff. While you keep allowing that, she’ll keep doing it. Change the locks and then text her. “I’ve changed the locks with my lawyer’s approval. Send me a list of everything you need from the house and I’ll have a look over it.”
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I apologized to D for our fight in front of her acknowledging that it impacts her and told her I am trying to work things out fairly with W. D replied no one was talking to W the way W was. D had somewhere to be, gave me a hug and went out. This morning, D and I had a conversation. I asked if she had any questions for me. She asked if W and I discussed it any further after what she witnessed. I said we did a little by text. I told her it’s important to me that I am fair to W.
Reading between the lines, it sounds like you’re seeking out validation from your daughter. You need to behave how you behave without seeking her validation about it all the time. The best way to prioritise your daughter’s wellbeing in this difficult time is not to fight with your wife in the first place. And how do to do that? STOP INTERACTING WITH WIFE.
Place yourself in your daughter’s shoes. You are at an impressionable age. You have a Mum who has gone off the rails. You have a Dad who lets people treat him like cr*p, continues to allow arguments to happen in front of you… and then comes to you for comfort!
Your daughter must feel like she is the only sane one, stuck inside some pathetic drama TV show.
Your daughter will learn more from you if you stand up to your wife, put boundaries in place and start being a strong, confident man. And to be honest, I’m sure that’s what she’s secretly hoping for.
