Please re-read bttrfly's postings as many times as you can. What she has posted is very, very spot on.

Any changes that you make must become permanent. You will know if the changes are the right ones for you. As for your h not thinking that the changes are permanent...don't worry about that. You are the only one that will know deep in your heart that the changes are permanent. Those changes are for you, not your h.

Always remember that actions speak louder than words. If you stumble along the way, pick yourself up, dust yourself off and continue moving forward. None of us are perfect in this world. We all make mistakes and we learn from those mistakes every day.

Hang in there!

Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to.
The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.