I’ve been sans wife for six and a half years. The kids moved out over the years, with daughter (the youngest) being the last one to leave. Been on my own for three years now.
Living alone does not automatically lead to unhappiness or loneliness. A person by themselves can be very fulfilled. Conversely, a person in a room full people can feel utterly lonely. And I have experienced both ends of that spectrum.
Depression brings about feelings of loneliness and unhappiness regardless of how many folks are around you. Depression is having one’s feelings crushing inward. Very little external inputs will have much affect upon that. It is the person themselves that needs to find acceptance to whatever their loss, grief, and/or cause of the depression is. Certainly, external things do help ease and distract our mind; yet one still needs to find their peace for lasting calm and contentment.
Loneliness and unhappiness: Feelings. Fleeting unless reinforced.
Living alone: Just one’s situation. Once accepted.
Something to remember, decisions based mostly upon emotions often lead to regret.
Grief is a hodgepodge of emotions. Even indifference - the numbness or absence of feeling - is a feeling. It takes time to work and walk your way through all that. I guarantee, you will feel differently in a few years. I certainly did.
I never made or set a drop dead date. For nothing kills hope like a deadline or expectation. Yet, I didn’t wait around either. I started out standing, then on to standing for me, which morphs into just life.
Strengthen that which serves, craft that which you aspire to, and alter or discard that which does not or no longer serves. When one organizes and realizes their beliefs and convictions, and lives them, things fall into place.
Beliefs take time. Invest into that. Invest into yourself. There is no better or greater opportunity or reason for one’s investment. And whatever you put in will pay out much more. To yourself and to others.
Make life decisions based upon beliefs and values. Those deep convictions are excellent life headings. Noble and good. Worthy and fulfilling.
Let go the fear and embrace the unknown. For the future is unwritten and unknown, the very ideals and realm where possibilities live and thrive. And I believe in possibilities.
My current life is excellent! Sure, my situation is not what I had planned or had any inclining that it would come about. Yet, here I am. We all have to play the cards we’re dealt. And believe me the game unfolds in ways one cannot foresee. Embrace the uncertainty and all the potential it holds.
You’ve not got to decide anything today. And likely shouldn’t.
Have faith. Discover and become you.
D
Feelings are fleeting. Be better, not bitter. Love the person, forgive the sin.
