I need to continue working on my validation skills
Some feedback:
Originally Posted by TellMeSo
I got many phrases like: "Is this revenge?" -NOPE. "This is exactly the reason why I want to divorce you"- "I can see why you would think that" "You are acting immature and childish"-"It must be frustrating for you" "You are stopping me from living my life"- "You are free to live however you want. Nobody is stopping you" "You trapped me for our whole relationship"- "I am sorry you feel that way" "I no longer trust you" - "I can understand the lack of trust" "I just can not communicate or do it with you" - "perfect" "You are too much for me to handle"- "i can see that"
I bolded the exact phrases I said to her. Good progress has been done based on your feedback Today we had another brief stint of communication where I validated her ideas in the same manner as you wrote. She was definitely less resistant or angry today.
Originally Posted by Ready2Change
Only say things once. This is a good skill the learn and master. Learn statements like this "I already told you. If you are not going to listen the first time, than I see no reason to continue talking with you"
Got it. Stick to saying things once.
Originally Posted by Ready2Change
Validation: "I understand that." You could also add "You sound frustrated" type statements. That shows you "get her". Different example: "You are obviously angry, so I believe it is best if we continue this conversation after you have calmed down"...You walk away and she will get move angry..which is OK.
I actually added a lot of such statements, but she refused to acknowledge them and even said I'm totally fine and calm. I'm happy. Perhaps I should have phrased it better, but she did not fully accept my validation either.
Originally Posted by Ready2Change
YUP, testing you. Do not react. Do not enter her frame. You want a woman who complements you life. Project that. live that.
One thing I learned was to let my lady be as emotional as she wants. I can handle it. As long as she is not being physical, I just listen and let her vent, even if it is about me. I am the emotional rock.
What is the main purpose of this testing? To see if I will be there for her? To see if I would crumble? It's interesting as somedays she is fully emotional, sometimes she does not show any emotion at all.
Today we had another brief stint of communication where I validated her ideas in the same manner as you wrote. She was definitely less resistant or angry today. 
