My wife says she is done

[MikeP]

Dats, I'm sorry your going through this. I can't imagine how hard it must be. When my W moved out, our kids stayed with me so it wasn't nearly as hard as your situation. Good job on the bowling party. I have so many pics of my kids on my phone and regular old pictures as well. I love getting the old pics out and losing track of time looking at them. Good luck to you. Hang in there, we're all pulling for you.

Thanks Mike. I agree about looking back at the pictures. Reminds me to cherish them everyday and be mindfully present for them now as a model and not think about the things out of my control. Time is going by way too fast.

I am grateful that I purchased a zoom (70-200) with 2.8 aperture lens for my mirrorless camera prior to W BD. It is a must to get to the next level of sports photography in not well lit arenas. I saw my photographer game develop at the same time the girls on the team were.

I going to be fine. I have so much cleaning to take care of after all the W packed moving boxes are out. And have plan tonight tomorrow and Saturday.


Then spring hockey starts next week for both kiddos.

Not that hi-tech in the photography game. I do know they make some decent lenses for smartphone that work quite well. I didn't take nearly enough pics over the past bball season. With d13 playing middle and high school we were in it for 6 straight months, plenty of mental pics, lol. Softball just started and the outdoor pics are usually better. Also track just started. Last year I managed a few good vid's of her. My father in law is the photo expert. He usually gives us copies of his. Good luck to you and your kiddo, hope hockey goes well.

Don’t get me wrong Smart phone cameras now a days are incredible. Sounds you have quite the athlete.

Definitely a busy athlete, driving her around feels like my new job. Best job ever.

[Dats000]

Ugh…W movers coming today. We had some pretty good talks lately about hoping the best for each other. About making sure we are both getting our fair share of stuff in the house. About our self help development. I let her know that I hope the best for her. And concerned she i will be ok during this transition. Told W I will not be around the house today while she is moving out . I’m keeping busy today. Took the day off of work. went to a coffee shop this morning, chiropractor appointment, opened my own checking account, got kid skates sharpened just left restaurant, should not have started this post in there as tears started falling. Now safe in my car. What a baby. 😭 I know I’m just having a moment I know this will pass I know things are and will get better. Off to set up direct deposit, walk with my friend and eventually go home when the dust from W moving out settles. Time for kids to be with their mom and me to reflect and being ok with being alone without the family I once had. I think it is gratitude check time for me. Really grateful for my dogs that will be with me while my kids are away. They are definitely my therapy dogs 🐶. I’m grateful my W and I have bet civil to each other through this gut wrenching experience. I’m grateful that I have a job that allows me to take time off to do what I need to do today. I’m grateful for the relationship with my sister which has gotten a lot better since the BD. She’s there anytime. I can call her. She listens and helps me out during those times I need someone.

[DnJ]

Hello Dats

Good for you setting up your own checking account and getting the direct deposit sorted out. There are some practicalities that one needs to attend to. If not yet done, I’d cancel joint credit cards and such, and request ones in your name only.

Glad you took the day off from work.

Really like the gratitude list. Dogs are good therapy. And talking with one’s sister is good too.

D

[Ready2Change]

so starting tomorrow. I won’t see my kids for five days

So 5 days are now "Me time" and then back to "Dad time".

Initially, I spent the "me time" getting things ready for "Dad time". For example, going grocery shopping and having all the meals planned out. That transition into taking the kids grocery shopping and getting them involved in the process.

Most people do not get enough "alone time". Cherish it because it most likely will not last that long. Good time to keep focusing on your personal growth.

"Dad time" are some of my fondest memories. Got to know my kids much better.

[Dats000]

so starting tomorrow. I won’t see my kids for five days

So 5 days are now "Me time" and then back to "Dad time".

Initially, I spent the "me time" getting things ready for "Dad time". For example, going grocery shopping and having all the meals planned out. That transition into taking the kids grocery shopping and getting them involved in the process.

Most people do not get enough "alone time". Cherish it because it most likely will not last that long. Good time to keep focusing on your personal growth.

"Dad time" are some of my fondest memories. Got to know my kids much better.

my self development goal during me time to learn to love unconditionally, have joy and excitement in preparation for dad time.

[Rockon]

Here for you Dats. Be well, take good care and enjoy hockey and friends. I pray for healing, comfort and peace for your heart. Strength and courage mate.

I have my last hockey game of the season tonight - all heading out for a feast, beers and awards after.

Rockon

[MikeP]

Ugh…W movers coming today. We had some pretty good talks lately about hoping the best for each other. About making sure we are both getting our fair share of stuff in the house. About our self help development. I let her know that I hope the best for her. And concerned she i will be ok during this transition. Told W I will not be around the house today while she is moving out . I’m keeping busy today. Took the day off of work. went to a coffee shop this morning, chiropractor appointment, opened my own checking account, got kid skates sharpened just left restaurant, should not have started this post in there as tears started falling. Now safe in my car. What a baby. 😭 I know I’m just having a moment I know this will pass I know things are and will get better. Off to set up direct deposit, walk with my friend and eventually go home when the dust from W moving out settles. Time for kids to be with their mom and me to reflect and being ok with being alone without the family I once had. I think it is gratitude check time for me. Really grateful for my dogs that will be with me while my kids are away. They are definitely my therapy dogs 🐶. I’m grateful my W and I have bet civil to each other through this gut wrenching experience. I’m grateful that I have a job that allows me to take time off to do what I need to do today. I’m grateful for the relationship with my sister which has gotten a lot better since the BD. She’s there anytime. I can call her. She listens and helps me out during those times I need someone.

Hang in there my man. Don't know what to say really except I'm thinking about you and I feel for you. Hopefully one day you'll post about the movers coming to move her back in.

Definitely not a baby. Better to let it out than to just bottle it up. It will come out eventually anyway, better to be in control. Take care.

[bttrfly]

{{{{{Dats}}}}}}

Question: did you read the love languages book?

What are your love languages, primary and secondary?

[Ready2Change]

my self development goal during me time to learn to love unconditionally,

I was watching a clip by marlon Wayans talking about Jada Smith this morning and this caught my attention:

This woman was so smart. she used to teach me about love.

She had these big power words and descriptions of love when she was 19.

She was telling me love is acceptance.
love is unconditional
love has no expectations because then you will be disappointed
love involves devastation
love is forgiving
and real love is healing
and I learned love is learning to let go.

A good exercise might be to see how big we could make this list.

[Dats000]

{{{{{Dats}}}}}}

Question: did you read the love languages book?

What are your love languages, primary and secondary?

No this is the first I remember hearing of this book. I have no clue with my love languages are. sounds like I need to add this to my list of books to read. I’m reading three books now so I’m gonna wait till I finish one of them before I start another one