Today was not a good day. I have days where I'm at peace and days where I hate everyone and cry all the time Today's the latter.
Sometimes we need the days like today. Get it out, wake up tomorrow, and do something different. Eventually these days will become less and less the norm. Suddenly they won't happen anymore. One day at a time. Bttrfly is right, you ultimately have control. Take back control from H and move forward. That's what I've been told repeatedly today and it makes sense. Hang in there, we're all pulling for you.