For clarification: I'm not advocating you stop standing. (and really, is it necessary for me to have to clarify this? And yes, taken from the passive aggressive tone of previous posters, it apparently is. Getting really very tired of that. No need to wonder why I and others choose NOT to post here as much any more).
So Mike, I am saying that it's an individual choice when and if to stop standing. And yes, you stand because that's what makes sense to you. You do something else when standing no longer makes sense to you. The decision to stand is about you, but I don't understand standing when the ex is married to someone else. I don't need to understand it, but I'll still say it again, that makes zero sense to me, so I'm not doing it. If someone feels otherwise, more power to them. It's a free country, for the time being at least.
Your sitch has a lot of positives. The date on the calendar is just a number. Again, take yourself to a movie or out to dinner or do something fun. Keep the focus on you. Make the changes for you. Anything you get from w is a bonus.
Others will tell you their stories about when they decided to stop standing or if they still are standing, but in all cases, it's a very personal decision. The only advice I give you or anyone else is to do a very deep dive into your own belief system and into how you want to spend the rest of your life before you make a decision to stay or go. You will absolutely know the right answer for yourself.
Thanks bttrfly. No need to clarify, I understood what you were saying. Please feel free to post on my thread no matter what you have to say. I like honesty, period. I don't have to like the message, just know that I will always appreciate it. I miss LH and Mach, they were usually blunt and to the point as well. I appreciate everyone's input no matter the delivery. My heart says that I will stand for a long, long time provided there is no evidence of another A. You are correct in that my sitch does have a lot of positives. I feel stupid sometimes posting about my sitch when others have it so much worse. It doesn't change what I've gone through though. Need to count my blessings and remain positive. My plan for BD is to spend the day hiking. There's a local place I've been visiting since I was a little kid, it's my fav place in the world to be honest. Thousands of acres of beautiful forest and trails. I go there a lot. Thanks for your help and please keep steering me in the right direction, I appreciate it.
