One day at a time 2

[bttrfly]

Standing. Interesting concept. Many different views on it.

I cannot and will not stand for a marriage when my spouse is married to someone else. This makes zero sense to me.

I suppose I have the choice, as do we all, to stand by my wedding vows or not.

Wedding vows, by their very nature, are an exchange between two people whose intention is to form a partnership.

A business partnership does not continue once the legal entity is dissolved, therefore it makes zero sense to me to stand by wedding vows for a partnership where I'm the solo participant.

I did not choose to end my marriage.

I did not cheat or break my vows while our marriage was intact, or even during our very long separation.

Why should I be denied companionship now that my divorce has been over and done with for over 6 years?

This makes zero sense to me.

This is not being fair to myself, given that I did all in my power to save my marriage, both before BD and after.

This is not living the life I want to live. I've always wanted a family and a partnership. I'm to be denied that because of the behavior and decisions made by the weakest link in the chain - my MLC exh ??? I don't think so.

If you want to look at the religious aspect of the wedding vows, I've already talked to clergy about that. I have clergy's blessing to date. Clearly defined lines of no hanky-panky per the priest, otherwise I will be guilty of committing adultery. We also discussed annulment, and whether or not there's just cause for that in my case (there could very well be), with advice being don't seek one until or unless you get serious about someone and want to get married again. How I choose to act or not act on the religious aspect is, in my mind, separate from standing.

Again, standing is an interesting concept with many different viewpoints/opinions on its definition.

Best to develop your own when the time comes.