Since September I have been on an app. Went off after the date with that weirdo who kept showing me his abs IN the restaurant while talking about himself incessantly. I know you gotta get through the bad dates….. but I have had my fair share….. and I don’t want to do it anymore . I also understand the consequence of me not doing that is being lonely for adult company.
I know I've been saying this for years now - but that's largely because IT'S TRUE!!! From everything I have heard, experienced personally, and still continue to hear, it's largely a land of misfits OLD. It's not you or whom you're attracting or picking. I still hear from women or friends of these woman who try OLD and experience the same crazy nonsense that you have. And I swear it's only gotten worse. Quality attracts quality and broken attracts broken. There is no secret how some of the best-ran organizations attract some of the best employees. The broken employers get more useless people who don't show up, don't put down their phones or can't pass the drug test. I swear it's the same with OLD - the word is out on both sides - the word is out it's not a place you go to find a quality LTR but is the place you go for a quick hookup - especially if you're in your 20s or 30s.
Might you be able to find someone of substance OLD? It's possible - perhaps, but you've been trying for what 5 years now? And other than a few what have you found? Even those few seemed pretty sketchy to us here - just better than the total goofs. Look at how many Butterfly has had to go through to find the one guy with promise - but who has never been married and is too busy to date for at least another month. Time will tell.
So while staying off the apps may reduce the number of dates you go on, it will also reduce the frustration with goofs like abs guy. It's why I finally turned it all off and never looked back. Well, I've looked, just to verify some of the very same people are still there along with dozens of clones, but I can't bring myself to do it again. It's only gotten worse. I'd rather end up in the same place but save the frustration.
I think you're making the correct decision staying off the apps. However, you need to replace it with other activities, like hocky games, outings with friends, work outs, work events. Eventually you will meet someone who at least won't show you his abs at dinner.
DonH Midwest Me 56 WAW-EXW 55 Met 11/95 / Married 5/00 Bomb 6/20/05 / She Filed on 6/2/06 / Divorced on 10/9/06 4 who'd qualify as GF since D & dated about 25 women since D
