The impact and trajectory of W’s choices. My acceptance of her choices. Her abandonment of our family and the M. Decisions I am faced with to protect our family, in order for us to grieve and heal.
I am considering telling W, “I understand that you are continuing to have an affair. I accept that you have chosen this. It hurts me very deeply and I am worried about the trajectory of what your choices will have upon our family. I can speak for myself and for what I see in our kids and what they are telling me that we feel abandoned. I am considering my options to protect our family so that we can grieve and heal.”
Haven’t decided if when and what exactly I should say. I don’t really like the phrase, “considering my options.” Maybe “I have some decisions to make” is better.
I do need to take my time with this and believe what I say - make my communication authentic.
I am considering telling W, “I understand that you are continuing to have an affair. I accept that you have chosen this. It hurts me very deeply and I am worried about the trajectory of what your choices will have upon our family. I can speak for myself and for what I see in our kids and what they are telling me that we feel abandoned. I am considering my options to protect our family so that we can grieve and heal.”
Haven’t decided if when and what exactly I should say. I don’t really like the phrase, “considering my options.” Maybe “I have some decisions to make” is better.
I do need to take my time with this and believe what I say - make my communication authentic.
My personal opinion is she already knows all this and you're wasting your breath. You're spending too much time analyzing the words to say when you're actions are much more important. Remember: Actions over Words. She needs to observe and feel you're moving forward, not hear it from you.
Me:39 Ex-W:37 M:7 T: 9 S:6 D:3 BD/IHS/Confirm EA/PA: Feb '20 OM1 affair ends: May '20 W/OM2 & moves out: June-July '20 W files for D: Jul20 OM2 confirmed: 9/2020 Divorced: May '21
