Yes for sure could have done it without W and I have been doing these types of things a lot. This was kind of like opening up a window after her repeated stated intentions to connect (cake eating?) and inviting her into what I have been doing.
I feel good about how it went and I’m not drawing any new conclusions for the future R. I went into the weekend peaceful and intending to have a ton of fun and I did. I was focused on managing myself and not being about W while hoping she would have a positive experience.
Our kids and I had a blast! Adventuring, laughing, playing in nature. I connected with others (men and women) well in the group and included W in a friendly way introducing her to community members. I played darts and pool with others and played with kids, etc.
W’s experience of the weekend? I dont know. Im not responsible for how she feels about it. I am responsible for my happiness and she is for hers. All I have to go on is what she says and shows (believing half of one and none of the other). I observed her engage well in the social setting with our family and others. She and I were cleaning up after a lunch and kids were out playing. She told me she is very unhappy and doesn’t know what’s to do. She said our kids dont want to be with her and she doesn’t have any friends. Maybe she will just move away she said. I listened and didn’t try to solve.
She said she was tired. I finished cleaning up and said Im meeting friends for a hike. She had a big nap i guess.
