Advice please. Meltdown this morning when I visited where H said he was working and car not there. I know I shouldn't have done this & I also knew what I would find. On the plus side, it has given me a bit of strength. I've been washing, cleaning, being super happy (apart from when I've been in tears) and generally making life at home very comfortable whilst he has been out with OW. I do think the affair has only been happening since mid Dec. My dilemma is do I confront him and ask him to leave and risk that he'll never come back? Or Do I carry on (its killing me) doing what I'm doing till after D(16) prom with him living his best life getting everything provided at home and going out getting his fix? He says that he's not saying yes and not saying no to trying to save the marriage and not ready to make a decision. I think the longer he has the best of both worlds, the longer the affair has to strengthen and it might be a hit of reality if I ask him to leave now. From a DB position, I'm really finding it hard being in the unknown and am moving toward it being better if he goes. I feel terrible anyway and at least if I know that he's not here, I can try and make a life for myself. How should I start a conversation like this? I want it to come from a calm place. I also want him to take ownership of why he is leaving (if he does) and tell the kids the reason. Is this reasonable?
Last edited by DnJ; 02/11/2301:31 PM. Reason: Corrected typos.
